The human mind at times can make the soul feel nothing less than a pile of carcasses. As if, reality punches you in the face and tells you to wake up from your utopian ideals and to look for once towards the people that actually matter. This is relative. It is often in life that everyone reaches a pinnacle where they feel helpless, hopeless and hapless. It feels as if everything that you’ve tried to achieve, it was nothing but the utopia of a dreamer that dreams incessantly regardless of the harsh truth that the reality creates a facade around.
So much of our lives are spent doing the things that WE want to do and though there is nothing inherently wrong with any of that, what is obviously wrong is that in the journey of accomplishing it, we become blind. We become like a herd of sheep enclosed in a barn with a fence and the only opening we see is the door of the fence. Thus in an opportunity to gain our own individual freedom, we as each one of the sheep only seem to focus on getting out of the fence for we think that the world awaits us beyond it however, in the process of it, each one of the individual sheep forget to look around them and get acquainted with another for everyone tends to think about entirely what they want and exactly how they are going to achieve it.
However, the interesting part arrives when all the sheep somehow gain that opening in the fence and they all escape from the same door into their “utopian freedom” and as soon as they do, it is reality that hits them. It isn’t entirely about escaping through the door into the wilderness that will probably define you, it is about the people you get to know in the journey of defining yourself because things do not define us, people we know do. The moment the herd of sheep escape, they apprehend that now that they are in their ideal wilderness, they don’t have anyone to share it with. Be it the happiness, contentment, sadness, satisfaction or even the grind, there is no home.
This is one of my favorite quotes from a book I am currently reading and I believe when I first came to understand it, I couldn’t help but cry at the reality of it all, for I kept running from it:
“One day, you and everyone you love will die. And beyond a small group of people for an extremely brief period of time, little of what you say or do will ever matter. This is the Uncomfortable Truth of life. And everything you think or do is but an elaborate avoidance of it. We are inconsequential cosmic dust, bumping and milling about on a tiny blue speck. We imagine our own importance. We invent our purpose – we are nothing. Enjoy your fucking coffee.”
– Mark Manson, Everything is F*cked – A Book About Hope
Many times in life, we think that isolating ourselves from people around us will help us reach our goals faster. We think that people will somehow be a distraction or an interruption in our own creative processes however it is actually the other way around. People, are what motivate us towards feelings, and feelings are what derives our actions. And it is oft-said that if you want to reach somewhere faster, then go alone but if you want to go further, then surround yourself with people you love. It is immensely heart-breaking when you arrive at a pivotal point in your life, when you realize that your so-called “master plan to your success” is not even a plan to begin with. The human nature is built to communicate and thus like a fish can’t survive in its natural culture of water, similarly the human nature can’t survive in an unnatural culture of isolation.
I believe any and everything that I say is to be inadequate for the people that we actually love, whether they are our families, friends, partners or even humanity as a whole, it is often difficult to love everyone equally and whether everyone deserves love is another question for a better time. For now, the most significant thing to take away is the importance of the people we love in our lives, and how our own selfish impulses at times can distance us from them. I am a firm believer in the fact that human life matters immensely and thus as a part of human nature and the society it is only fair that we all fulfill our small part of responsibility.
I can state that it is immensely hard to alter our self-prescribed course in life and it is only a few things at a few moments in life that actually move you to better apprehend your actions and words and learn from them to try not reinstate a sense of nihilism. We think that our sense of embarrassment and social anxiety at times overpowers our ability to express our love and care for those that matter to us, but then again nothing of significance was ever acquired in our comfort zones and nothing of significance was ever achieved overnight, it was a constant effort over timeless periods of ups and lows. However, if there is one thing to take away, it is that people that we actually love and people that actually love us are worthy than anything ever to persist for and remain steadfast for.
How often do we sit back and think of all the people that we haven’t talked to in a while or we haven’t catched up with in years. Yes, it is heart-wrenching to think about it but nothing is impossible to attain if honest efforts are involved for nothing is ever beyond us. More importantly, if there is one thing I have apprehended, it is to try and consciously think for others before ourselves. If we think that things can’t be any worse, there are millions of people out there that have it worse and even though many times whatever we do seems inconsequential but the fact that we try incessantly is an edifice of optimism. I can understand that it is difficult to provide for others or empathize with them when everyone is struggling to provide for themselves, however the most significant tenet that remains and that we should tend to understand as we struggle to come out of a crisis is a statement that I have come to learn, “It is often by looking in others, that we find ourselves.”